Thursday, April 10, 2008

Life vs Living

Living live is series of lies.
Life is real truth.

Perhaps the above statements sounded a bit too harsh and very contradicting. I have reasons for saying & believing so. But, I always start any relationship based on trust. Since I strongly believe that life is real truth and living live is series of lies, how can trust becomes so important to me? Many people believe that one can never trust lies simply because they believe dishonesty is unacceptable. But what is the relationship between lies and dishonesty? I can agree if lies and dishonesty mean the same, or equate each other. Unfortunately, a lie and dishonesty have its own definition. So, again the question is what is the relationship between these two? At this juncture, perhaps many are getting confused already. 

Living live is series of lies.
Stand in front of a mirror and see yourself. I am sure everyone can see at the shirt, dress, pants, or skirt that you are wearing. The reflection from the mirror is a lie. All of us are born naked, without even a strain of thread on our skin. Since nature brings us to life naked, how come all of us are covered with nylons, cottons, wools, etc.? Putting clothes to your body (and mine) is plain and simple lie. No animal or plant is covered by something else other than what life has given them at the first place.

It is highly interesting, to me, when people often associate trust when it comes to situation that involves lies and dishonesty. I have learned how understanding and perception can be very evil; where both always fail to give an absolute explanation in dealing with trust issues. Social and cultural values are almost biological built in us, though we were not born with both. It is impossible to deny this since we never had the chance to choose what to learn and what not while we were growing up. Everything that we experienced will become a part of people's personal development. Sadly, people do not have any choice because we are not alone on this world. People are created to live in a society, hence social development become too associated with our personal development. Based on this premise alone I can be very firm on my stand that living life is just a series of lies. People are made to accept and/or not accept anything that are included in both social and cultural values. Technically, we never had the chance to be selective of which values suits the individuality per se. Hence making us telling ourselves to adjust and be comfortable with the majority. Aren't that actions alone are lies?

I'd like to relate this to my personal experience when it comes to having no option but to live the values existed in the social & cultural perspective which I live in. Since I was born till now, I have been living with my beloved parents. It is a fact that since then I had to start my education by having my mom & dad as teachers. Also, in many other societies, parents involvement in children personal growth and development are inter-related with the type of education they receive since day 1 until he/she decides to leave the 'institution'. Why do I have to learn from this two individuals tagged as parents to me, if there is other people around? It is a fact that these two individuals are responsible for 'making' me at the first place. I am indeed thankful and greatful to get complimentary services as part of the package being brought to this world. For many years I have food, clothes, place to sleep, etc.; in which to me are the type of services normally received from individual(s) known as parents. Personal growth & development is an individual right, so am I really exercising my rights at getting the right education I need for myself? Does biological relationship gives rights to these 2 individuals to educate me at the first place, knowing that I may not learn or those 'syllabus' may not be the right one for me? Teaching the wrong thing itself is a lie. Being taught & then using the knowledge learned are also lies.

Maybe my example is too complicated to be understood. Let me share an easier example to clear some of the grey clouds. People communicate all the time. We usually use our native language to communicate with all people. I believe everyone would notice and are fully aware that although we use the one language, the methods of using the language varies according to situation? I prefer to use the standard style of language to communicate, but too often I am forced to change the style and modes when I am addressing my family members, my working colleagues, my friends, etc. Even when I know that everyone in this society knows and understands the standard style, I have to lie to myself and select the right accent or slang plus the style of communication so I could be understood at sending my message. Perhaps most people do not realize this interesting situation. When you have to put aside the value you are most comfortable with and you select something else so you could blend in, it is still a lie.

So, am I being too harsh saying that all these while people are lying by just living a life?

Life is real truth.
No matter how hard you try to avoid lies, we are still living a life. Life however is real truth. The series of event which we experience are facts. My mom and dad are 2 individuals who 'made' me. My mom went to labour and gave birth to me, bringing me to life. These two individuals went to all trouble to give me a comfortable and decent life. I have four younger siblings, who were born after me. I went to school where there were individuals known as teachers who gave me the so-called formal education. In school there were other individuals with same age, younger or older known as students whom I get associated with, known as friends. These are some of the facts in my life.

The physical attachment a person encounter in living is the life, if you could get where I am going here. It is a matter of what and how that differentiate life and living life. When you ask 'what', then the answer is absolute and real. In communication for example, when you ask, "What language do you speak?", the answer can be English, Malay, Chinese, Japanese, Spanish, etc. On the other hand, when you ask, "How do you speak the language?", the answer can be very subjective and perceived differently, such as "I use simple words speaking to children," or "I sound softer when speaking to my parents compared to when I speak to my boss," etc. Can you see the difference?

Despite of this clear difference, still there is a thin line between life & living which has created much confusion. If we look deeper into this matter, we can find so many unanswered questions about living life than life itself. Human actions are something which can be controlled. That is why I labelled it as 'series of lies', which is highly sensible to be understood. Lies are human actions. The reason I brought up this issue is highly related with the questionable quality of individual and society nowadays. More people are becoming less smart because the 'series of lies' had greatly influenced the process of becoming a smart person. We have allowed the 'living life' to dictate the 'life', whereby it should be another way around. If you have 5 pots of flowers to water, you should get 5 cups of water for 5 flowers. That is the best way it should be. Instead, we now see too much of 4 cups (or less or sometime more) of water used for the 5 flowers.

In conclusion, the relationship between life and living must be clear, or else we are only at the loosing end. 




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